31.12.08

If It Makes You Happy

If it makes you happy...
...then you have to know that at the same time,
you break my heart into pieces.

You have drawn a true disappointment deep down inside,
yet I hope it makes you happy.

Do I have to shed my tears every single time?

Or perhaps,
I shouldn't be as patient as I have been by far.

You tell me.

28.12.08

The Same Feeling

Either when you're far, or near,
in my heart you have stayed...

I miss you all the way.

You can sleep well no matter what,
I wish I could have the same luxury.

But in a way,
it has been a blessing.

That every second matters,
when it comes to you.

I miss you all the way,
my beloved boyfriend.

25.12.08

It Has Been You

I've been dealing with this trouble sleeping,
but how can I share?
You have had your own thoughts and problems,
and it would not be wise enough for me to share.
I would be selfish to give another burden.
And I waited.

So I've been planning on getting some pills,
with a hope that it would be a solver.

Then it came,
when I finally spoke of it.
It was the predicted response that you made,
and I wish I hadn't spoken it.

You asked, "What would be the cause of your sleeping trouble?"
I stayed in silence,
but my thoughts mourned...

It has been you.
The thoughts of you.
My great feeling of wanting you close.
I still can't figure a way out to distract my own thoughts.

But I didn't have the guts to tell you so.
I wish you had given me a hug,
but I would be selfish to give another burden.

19.12.08

It's Like

It's like walking without knowing where,
and all I can do is stare.
My cold wet feet and fingers start to tremble,
wishing for a warm hug or a simple cuddle.

It's like asking without getting the answer,
and so I force to get myself together.
There's nothing left to weep,
yet tears still flow down as the heart has been cut deep.

It's like eating without any hunger,
and I only eat to stay alive a bit longer.
What a tempting gift that could never be possessed,
it only makes one become more obsessed.

It's like watching an empire falls,
people have been too busy with their ego and phone calls.

My Lord shall be with me all the way...

15.12.08

This Butterfly Inside My Stomach

I used to wonder about it,
for hours before my consciousness disappeared.

Now I have it.
I don't want to lose it.

Not this time.

1.12.08

Rise Again

It has been a while.
Oh..how I miss the words popping out from my mind with style.

Yes. Yes.

Mind is a battle field of my own,
and the last thing I want to know is always shown.

I shall battle myself.